Big Feelings About Back-to-School: A Mom’s Guide to Easing the Transition

Back-to-School Isn’t Just About the Kids

We expect kids to have big feelings about the first day of school — new routines, new teachers, maybe even a new building. But what often goes unspoken is that moms have big feelings too.

Whether it’s your child’s very first time going to school or just another “first day” in the books, this season can bring a mix of pride, sadness, anxiety, and relief. You might find yourself tearing up at drop-off, worrying about how they’ll adjust, or feeling a pang at how fast they’re growing up.

And all of that is completely normal.

Why Moms Feel So Much During This Transition

1. Milestones Mark Time Seeing your child walk into school — backpack bouncing — can suddenly make you aware of how quickly childhood is passing.

2. Letting Go Handing your child over to new teachers and a new environment can stir up protective instincts and fears about whether they’ll be okay.

3. Shifting Routines The lazy rhythm of summer gives way to structured mornings, after-school schedules, and endless forms to sign — which can be a lot to manage.

4. Your Own School Memories Sometimes, your feelings are tangled with your own childhood experiences, both good and hard.

   
   

For Moms Sending Kids to School for the First Time

If your child is heading off to preschool or kindergarten, you’re facing a big leap — for both of you. Here’s what can help:

• Do a Practice Run: Visit the school together, walk the halls, and meet the teacher if possible.

• Create a Goodbye Ritual: A special hug, high-five, or phrase you say every drop-off can help both of you feel secure.

• Plan a Post-Drop-Off Treat: Give yourself something to look forward to — coffee with a friend, a peaceful walk, or even just a quiet moment at home.

  
  

For Moms With Kids Returning to School

If your kids are heading back after summer, the challenge is often the shift back into structure:

• Start the Routine Early: A week before school starts, ease into earlier bedtimes and morning wake-ups.

• Get Organized Together: Let kids help choose lunch items, pick their first-day outfit, and set up their backpack station.

• Build in Connection Time: A short after-school chat, snack, or walk together helps you both reconnect before the evening rush.

  
  

Caring for Your Own Emotions

You can support your kids best when you care for yourself, too.

• Name Your Feelings: “I’m feeling proud and a little sad” — naming it makes it less overwhelming.

• Lean on Support: Share the day with friends, your partner, or other moms who get it.

• Mark the Milestone: Take a photo, write a note to your child, or start a tradition that celebrates this stage in both your lives.

  
  

A Gentle Reminder

Back-to-school is more than just logistics — it’s an emotional shift for the whole family. Feeling teary at drop-off or counting the minutes until pickup doesn’t mean you’re overreacting. It means you love your child deeply and you’re adjusting, too.

With time, the new routine will feel more natural, and you’ll both grow through the transition. Until then, give yourself grace — and keep the tissues handy.

If the back-to-school season is bringing up anxiety, sadness, or overwhelm that feels hard to shake, therapy can help you process the emotions and find balance — so you can show up as the grounded, present parent you want to be.